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Hydrocodone,Oxycodone,Xanax |
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The first time I tried a pain killer was when I injured my back from lifting alot of weight. I was prescibed Vicodin 500/mg. I starting taking them and was instantly hooked. This started a 7 year cycle of up and down. I started to use more painkillers because of the false sense of comfort they gave me. I self-medicated to get away from my problems. It got to the point where I was taking 20+ 1000mg pills daily. I was spending all of my money on pills and was broke. I hated my life and myself from these CHOICES I had made. |
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I chose recovery because on November 21st 2005 I tried to kill myself. I was convinced that the only way to be at peace with myself was to cut my wrists. I ended up crying out for help to my family and chose life instead of death. |
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My recovery is going well 3 weeks in and my withdrawel symtoms have all but gone away. My family has supported me unconditionally through it all. I will begin a drug treatment program in another week. For now I have surrounded myself with people who love me and have chosen to take things a day at a time. |
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First and foremost: YOU CANNOT DO THIS ALONE. I tried for years to try and beat this awful addiction by myself because of embarassment and because I thought that I could. Secondly : Painkillers and self-medicating are easy fixes to mask problems. They are false senses of comfort. Real peace comes from the heart and soul, not from a pill. Take things a moment and thought at a time and CHOOSE LIFE. |
