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I was prescreibed pain medication for oral surgery and I fell in love with the high. It wasn't long before I was hooked. I then slipped a disc in my back and was given more. Within 6 months I was addicted. I didn't do anything without taking a vicodin, and I was having trouble keeping my supply full.
The vicodin numbed all of my physical pain as well as the emotional pain and anxiety I had experienced for a long time. All of a sudden. It was gone, and I felt great. I didn't realize it was going to return and be 10 times worse. |
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My turning point was when I realized that my life had spiraled out of control. My life revolved completely around my addiction and I thought of nothing else. I was high on my wedding day and on my honeymoon.
My anxiety then became uncontrollable and I knew I needed professional help when I endd up in the ER one night with a severe anxiety attack. I thought I had taken too many pain pills, and was overdosing, when I was actually having a terrible anxiety attack. |
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I did a 7 day, medically supervised detox. It wasn't terribly painful, I just felt really spacey for the whole week. It was also very anxiety producing , but I knew that I had no choice. I then joined an outpatient program where I go about 10 hours a week to group therapy, as well as weekly visits with my therapist and psychiatrist.
I am now sober 104 days. |
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Do not be afraid to reach out to others during recovery. You will need a support team and good friends. People you can call at 2 am when you feel like "picking up".
Get honest with yourself. It is not a way to live, there is so much peace and light waiting for you.
I feel as if I am learning how to live again . It is scary, yet beautiful, empowering and I am gaining control of my life once again.
Live for today. Your past is your past. |
